“You are your best thing” ~Beloved, by Toni Morrison
Do you know about the P-club?
The club of Procrastination. The one club we all have walked in and stayed too long. Maybe not always - only in the periods of our lives we wanted to avoid something. We probably were having a good time, while our brain was telling us “shouldn’t you be doing this or that?”. If there was a real P-club, I would definitely be a member. Honour medal and all.
But I also know when it’s time to come out of the P-club and focus on what really matters to keep me going - my body, mind and soul. Some periods in our lives, this is easier said than done. Most times we know it’s our own fault when we’re not reaching our true potential or not living our best lives. Yeah, I know you know what I’m talking about. So let’s be honest.
Most of the times, we are not living our best lives because we are not putting our own needs first. Especially us women.
There. I’ve said it. Even though we all have the best intentions, we are quick to put our own needs last. At a certain point we stop doing what is best for our bodies, our souls or our mental health. We get so wrapped up with other things and people in our lives - kids and work, family and friends and looking for that lost sock….
It can be frowned upon (by our inner critic or by other people) if we take some time out just for ourself - even if it’s for one hour. Remember, in an airplane they tell you to put your own mask on first, even before your children. How else are you going to help somebody, when you can’t breathe? Or if you keep on giving and never take the time to replenish yourself? Lack of self care is a big reason why so many people feel they have lost themselves.
I don’t believe that Self Care is selfish. On the contrary. If you don’t take care of yourself, how long do you think it will be before something’s gotta give? It may happen gradually over the years. But since we only get one round on this pretty earth of ours, it would be a waste to not live our best lives - starting today.
It’s not a matter of ‘If you need to take care of your body, mind and soul’.
It’s ‘When are you going to take care of your body, mind and soul’.
See the difference? If in this sentence is always a form of not being sure. If here means you are dabbling - not committing.
When you start to take care of yourself - body, mind and soul - in what ever way suits you best, that’s when you will feel better aligned with yourself. Your energy will flow in a more positive way and you will have more to give to yourself and to others.
Ask yourself this: How committed are you, to take care of You? Start by really thinking what gives you joy or makes you smile. What makes you breathe easier or gives you that feeling of content? Pay attention to what that is and do that more often.
Creating a moment of joy can also be done by something simple. An easy way for me, is taking a longer walk to the grocery store and smiling at strangers. I do this all the time. It makes me feel happy. Check point for my body and soul. And when people smile back, they probably will feel better too. It’s all about being intentional with doing something positive that makes you feel good. And I know this isn’t for everyone - but if you want, go for it! And let me know how it goes. You might not get a smile back, that’s okay. Keep smiling because you feel good. It will radiate and spread because positive energy is contagious - so spread it where you can.
Some of the easiest things to lift up your energy level you probably already do. No need to overhaul your whole life to practice better self care. But you have to make some time for yourself (even 30min can lift your spirit) and do things with more intention. The more you do this, the longer it will affect you in a positive way.
Some simple things you can do right away: walk more, take a hot bath or shower, talk to another human being (not online, but face to face), dance in your kitchen, read a book with real pages, eat your veggies, clean your face, sleep more, clear your closet, knit or sew, or learn something new, laugh out loud, or have a good ugly cry - Remember, you do you. Also, notice that most of these things don’t cost extra money. The whole point of this is you feeling good, positive and re-energized.
Practicing self care will look different for all of us. But if you are able to move your body, clear your mind and do something joyful, all on a regular basis with intention - you are practicing self care.
And that is three check points - all for You.
Maureen x
Photo: Thought Catalog via Unsplash
